How I almost became a film star, or...

[Andrej Gaspari <aeg@xxxxxxxxxxxx>]

...Not to be appearing in a commercial near you.

Well, folks, you're not going to believe this one. It so happens that
BMW was filming a series of shots for use in showroom video,
commercials, and the like at a nearby state park. I happened to be there
this morning, and when I saw the road blocked off and a blue M Coupe
making a U-turn on the other side, I figured something was up. So, I
dashed home, grabbed my 2002, and headed back to watch.

After talking to the cop at the lower roadblock for a while, and
watching most of the BMW lineup (including the aforementioned M Coupe,
an M Roadster, Z3, 540i sedan and Touring, M3 convertible, and 740i)
drive by in sequence (while circling to go back up the mountain), I was
told by the cop that the road was open for a few minutes while they set
up for the next shot. So, I drove up and found the line of BMWs parked
along the side of the road. I stopped behind them, got out, and started
talking to the director (who has a nice 635csi) and the drivers. The
director asks me what I'm doing for the rest of the day (not much) and
would I be willing to do them a favor. You see, it turns out BMW had
sent one more car than the crew had drivers...

Yes, they asked me to drive. I was, being a kind and giving person,
willing to assist them in their hour of need, so I agreed. They told me
they were breaking for lunch, and what did I want. This just gets better
and better.

After lunch, we rolled back out to where the cars were parked, and stood
around chatting for a while. However, a new face had appeared in the
person of BMW's representative in charge of this project. There was
speaking in low voices and several furtive glances made in my direction
as she and the director confered. This is never good. She, concerned
about my lack of inclusion on their previously-written special insurance
coverage, decided that it was not to be. I was booted at the last
minute.

The director and his assistant were quite apologetic, despite it not
being their fault. In all honesty, I probably would have made the same
call as the BMW rep did - face it, I'm not trustworthy (of course, the
White Zombie t-shirt and the evil smirk probably didn't help, either...)
I said goodbye to the crew and took off for home in my trusty yellow 02.
So there's my story. Life's a real bitch goddess, ain't it?

- -- 
- -AEG

Just because you're not paranoid doesn't mean they aren't out to get
you. (They are, damn it! I know they are!)

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