Re: Why an Alfa?

[Wille R in Scandinavia <veloce@domain.elided>]

It was not one of those "Love at first sight" experiences. In 
fact, it started in the beginning of the '60:s when I was in 
Riccione, Italy. That's when I first saw an Alfa Romeo sporting 
car. The Giulietta Sprint looked so slim and fast.

The thing that really turned me on was the roaming sound from the 
twin-cam engine. I can still remember when a red Giulietta Sprint 
came on the Viale Dante with the 1300 engine revving, slowly 
passing the spectators. The engine was at constant revs, and the 
driver looked very pleased.

The guy in the car was an Italian who, like most Italians, had a 
genuine passion for beautiful blond Scandinavian girls. Since I 
knew a lot of blond Scandinavian girls who were staying at the 
same hotel as I did, I asked him to take me for a ride in the car. 
This "Mini-Casanova" laughed and said "never, never", but if I 
could introduce him to the girls, we might have a deal.

Said and done. I was fourteen years old and the girls were 
eighteen or more, so they all treated me like something the cat 
had taken on the carpet. Teenage girls never like younger boys, 
perhaps they remind them of their kid brothers?

However, I soon found out that one of the females was kinda 
attracted to the Mini-Casanova, so I arranged a meeting. The 
blond, Lena, said she would only date the Italian if I was there 
too. Wowww!!!

That evening he came in his red Giulietta Sprint and Lena was very 
good looking. I had to sit in the back seat, but there was no back 
seat, only a little space to keep your tennis racket. Never mind, 
I was in the Alfa. Then Mini-Casanova took off!

This Giulietta Sprint only had two engine revs, idling and 6.800. 
I soon changed his name to "Mini-Fangio" like he was driving. He 
was shifting gears like mad and overtaking every car on the road. 
The engine was roaming like an aeroplane and he was using it's 
full power. After some minutes we left Riccione and were heading 
for San Marion.

The Giulietta Sprint was designed for the narrow roads leading up 
the mountain to San Marion. We met other cars on the winding 
roads, but Mini-Fangio was king of the road.

The brakes were extremely effective and I was rumbling in the back 
seat as he stopped and accelerated. I'll never forget the roaming 
sound of the well tuned Alfa-engine.

When I was exited and screaming for more, Lena turned blue and 
green and pale. She didn't speak a word, she was just sitting 
there with her big blue eyes wide open. Suddenly, everything she 
had eaten the last week came out on the dash-board.

End of racing. I had to take the bus back with Lena who blamed me 
for everything. She thought she would be killed in that terrible 
car and swore, she would never enter an Alfa Romeo again. Well, I 
certainly would!

As always, never trust a girl. Two days later she was in the 
Giulietta Sprint again, but this time I was banned from the car. 
Mini-Fangio was Mini-Casanova again!

Well, to tell you the truth, my passion for the Roundtail is 
something like love affair. I have never had so many good times in 
my life as when the Roundtail is involved. As you probably already 
know, in 1962 to 1970, I used to work in Riccione, Italy when I 
was a teenager. That sure was something, leaving chilly 
Scandinavia for the warmth of the sun in Italy. My task was to 
make some clubs popular and well known to young Scandinavian 
tourists.

Imagine how fun that was. 1966 I had a FIAT 125, company car, but 
was constantly looking for Alfas. You may share my joy, when 
Sandro, the brother of my "Patrone" Stefano Pattachoni came slowly 
in his red Duetto 1600, second gear and constant 3.000 revs. What 
a sound.

I must have looked quite funny, the size of my eyes were like 
ordinary beer-glasses. I had never ever before seen something that 
turned me on to this extent. The shape of the rear end of the red 
Duetto was like the shape of a beautiful girl, very sensual. 
Today, I say it is like a beautiful woman, now that I am 50+. The 
tail lights correspond so gently to the lines of the bumpers. The 
Round tail gives me a vision of a very attractive female giving me 
the eye. Wow, it really turns me on.

Sandro was not that keen on me driving his red Duetto, but we made 
an agreement. Since I was a tall blond Scandinavian with no red 
Duetto but lots of female connections and he was rather small, 
Italian and no such connections but a red Duetto, we got along. We 
both drove over to the clubs and when he seemed to like the 
atmosphere, he stayed and I drove away.

I could drive for hours along the Adriatic sea. Listening to the 
sound of the Webers and the twin cam engine, overtaking and 
shifting gears all the time. I often forgot to return until the 
sun was rising. It was hard to explain to Sandro, that I had only 
been driving and not fooling around with his girlfriends.

The arguments always ended with something like "sorry, won't 
happen again, but I know a nice club with lots of blondes!" That 
solved the problems. I was so fascinated by the red Duetto that I 
slept only two to four hours a day. My eyes very beginning to look 
rather dark with some spots of red. Tired but very happy.

His red Duetto had one of those (today) very primitive record 
players with just one single loudspeaker. I had two ears and three 
records. So what did I do? I played Jerry Lee Lewis "Roll over 
Beethoven", Neil Sedaka's Oh Carol, Rita Pavone's Cuore over and 
over again. The Italians were not that keen on this kind of music, 
so I met new Italian friends all the time wherever I was driving. 
They preferred Rita Pavone or some of the very good Italian artist 
instead.

The main problem in those days was money and gas. I made a fool of 
myself quite often, when the red gas warning light turned on. It 
might be nice sitting with a nice female out in the woods with no 
gas, good music (my kind of music, that is) and necking. My 
problem was, that the gas stop always happened right in the middle 
of Viale Dante with the crowd of tourists all around. No necking 
there, no, no. I had to borrow from my girlfriends to be able to 
get some fuel.

Some females have a tendency not to value sitting in a red Duetto, 
talking gear ratios, twin carbs etc. Pretty soon I was known as 
that "Alfaholic with Spidermania". That summer, a Swedish 
newspaper was doing a report about vacation an Italy. Well, I was 
there and drove around with the red Duetto, showing the clubs and 
disqouteches, rather rare in 1967. I introduced the journalist to 
some of my friends and he wrote like a maniac all the time, took 
pictures and asked funny questions.

My mum had her 60'th anniversary in September, and that very same 
day, the newspaper had a very big article about me. I was 
appointed a guy who's only interest was to fool around with cars 
and girls. My mum and the rest of the family were very, very, 
upset and my current girlfriend who was in Sweden, became my 
ex-girlfriend. I found it very odd to explain on the phone from 
Italy that the article was not true. Nobody believed me.

I still remember that night, all alone, no friends, girl had run 
away, mum embarrassed. What to do?

No problem. I just took the key in my hand, look at the red 
Duetto. Jumped in the car to just sit there for a while. I turned 
the ignition on and listened to the mumbling engine and the sound 
from the Webers. Gently pressed the clutch down and pressed the 
accelerator, up and down a few times to check the oil pressure. 
Engage first gear and take off, not too fast, just so the engine 
makes the rear tyres get a firm grip of the road. Second gear. a 
bit more on the accelerator but no too much. I did not want the 
rear of the Roundtail to skid. Third gear and now it is time to 
use the full potential of the car, revving 6.500 it is time to 
cool down so I use fourth gear and the fifth gear and cruise along 
the Adriatic sea. The red Duetto is becoming quite close to me 
now, like she was putting her head on my shoulder.

Time to turn on the record player, Jerry Lee "The Killer" rocks 
on. The red Duetto is almost flying and she takes me up in the 
blue sky, where "Io volare et cantare" out my happiness and joy.

I was so motivated that I forgot time, newspapers, Sandro, Mum, 
eating, returning or Policia Stradale. That ride cost me around 
150 USD. The Law had been trying to overtake me for five minutes 
they said. Anyway, that was when I decided to buy a red Duetto of 
my own.


Saluti		Wille R
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End of alfa-digest V7 #964
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