Clueless Is As Clueless Does

[Duane <drcollie@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx>]

>Hello Digesters,
>	Wondering if anybody knew how to re-wire my driving lights on my E30 so that
>they will come on when only the parking lights are on.  I thought it would
>give me a different look while at the track.  Thanks.
>
>Jason Odle
>BMW CCA pending

....<knock - knock - knock>.... HEEELOOOOOOOOOOooooooooooo...... Anyone Home? 

Jason....Jason.....Jason.  You want a different 'LOOK' at the track so
you're gonna run with your parking lights on WITH your fog lamps burning???
 Wait a minute! We can do better....really....<burp>.....that fog lamp look
is so....well....it's simply passe'.  That was LAST year's look. For '99
you'll want to be cutting edge so let me suggest;

Let's get your windows all tinted up really, really dark, run clear
stoplight lenses on the rear with white stop lamp bulbs, get some nice
chrome NICHE wheels and then install some neon lights in the wheel wells.
Don't forget to properly over-decal your car with oversize "AKIMOTO RACING
FILTER" stickers. A big chrome can on the ass end of the exhaust will
complete the package unless of course you wanna go all the way with extra
///M emblems randomly placed on the car. You'll then be KO-pasetic.

"THE LOOK" is verrrrrryyyyyy important while at "THE TRACK".  Suggest you
contact Team Ferrari Instructor Mark N. a.k.a DA KOMPRESSOR and consult
with him as to how best get noticed as I think you and he have about the
same amount of actual track time.

<psssssst>....<whispering>.....<ahhhhhh don't wanna embarass you here but
thought I'd better tell you that most driving schools frown on you running
lights on the track unless the car has DRL's. Kinda distracts the drivers
you come up on and all...considered bad form and all, y'know>.

Suggest you write to BIMMER magazine and ask their TECH column how to do
this if you plan to go ahead with it.  I think this is right up their alley.

Time for a Rolling Rock and some Doritos.  And I thought taping up the
foglights with body-colored duct tape was the fashion. I must be getting old.

Duane Collie
RM3DR1/UUC/Pizza
 

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