[alfa] re: Alfa youth

[Tessie McMillan <tessmc@xxxxxxxxxxx>]

Hi Monty,

I've been involved in clubs spanning a variety of interests and held lots 
of positions -- instructor, rescue worker, events planner, editor, 
secretary, and.... invisible member. I've found that it doesn't matter
which club (Alfa, Porsche, Ferrari, local dog club), or which part of the 
world you belong to, the politics and interactions can be very similar, 
and my best advice is for you to manage your specific situation so that 
you get the best out of it. There is always a place for you, and the good 
news is, you get to make it for yourself, you don't need to ask permission 
of anyone -- least of all the board members. Pay your dues (literally, not 
figuratively, although a lot of us on this list have really paid our dues 
in the figurative sense &:-)), and show up at events. That is step number 
one. Step number two is up to you, and go into it with your eyes wide open 
and feel free to move around to where you feel comfortable.

The volunteer world is not like a school or corporate world; members are 
guided by an overall mission statement, but how activities are directed 
depends to large extent on the current board members driving the 
machinery. Bad behavior can't be extinguished the way it can in the 
corporate or academic world simply by expelling someone who doesn't abide 
by the rules. Remarkably, excellent leaders are not always recognized, 
on the one hand because everyone is a volunteer and unwilling to 
recognize some people might be doing something "better", but on the other 
hand because clubs tend to be big and heavy machines and it's kind of 
like steering a big air-craft carrier. There will also be formal leaders 
and informal leaders. In a good club, these will be the same people; in a 
dysfunctional club, these will be different people and you'll want to make 
sure you are pitching your involvement to the informal leaders.

One word: relax. It's just a volunteer organization. Unfortunately, 
because it is a volunteer organization, people are there because they want 
to, and they often align their personality, values, and needs in tangent 
with what they perceive their success is in that organization. Remember 
that the organization is a dynamic collection of people and is extremely 
influenced by social behavior. Remember that what happens today is 
forgotten tomorrow. Man, I can't tell you the number of temper tantrums 
I've seen in volunteer situations. And if you think the men can be bad, in 
all-women orgs I've belonged to there's been sniping and backbiting like 
you wouldn't believe. The word "volunteer" brings out some evil mojo in 
people.

That said, some of the best friends I've ever had in my ENTIRE life have 
come from my interactions with volunteer organizations. My Alfa buddies 
(most of whom are on this digest!) count at the top of that list. We all 
share a similar interest and that creates a good bond. What if you 
temporarily narrowed your love of Alfas down a bit to scope for a niche 
in your local club. Try out the tours, the breakfasts, the tech sessions, 
and the track events and autocrosses! See the different mix of people at 
the different events, and you'll find what pushes your buttons the most. 
You'll also hook up with some like-minded people. My gosh, if you jump in 
with both feet and become committeed up the kazoo, you will burn out your 
little heart and and THAT you do NOT want to do. You want to temper your 
participation to keep yourself energized, motivated, and having fun. 
Presumably this is a life-long commitment.

I can tell you what it's like to be the 'outsider', as I've had many 
opportunities to be that person. But you can't focus on yourself, or your 
age. You need to turn your interest outwards; that's the point of the 
club.

Get back on that horse and have fun!

Take care,

Tess
in Bellevue, WA USA
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