This weeks Alfa Romeo capers

["Tim Hancock" <timhancock@domain.elided>]

I'm not sure whether I am completely mad or just a little deranged, but some
of you may have picked up on the fact that a second 164 has found its way to
my humble abode..and it all started with one of those "Free Alfa Romeo" ads on
the 164 Web site  that none of us quite trust. Well I volunteered to give it a
home, by which time a price of #100 ($150) was being asked for the complete
car, a 94 24V valve Super with a slipped cambelt. I still went for it, and
arrangements were made with the owner David Manton for me to collect it on a
flatbed last friday from Godstone just off the south side of the M25 south of
London (near the Gatwick Airport exit). My local contacts here put me in touch
with a local banger race car driver (destruction derby type) who had a flatbed
and a deal was struck. So I met Sean Stark (Starky) and of we went at 9am
after introducing ourselves over a cuppa. (Theres a Zen moment coming, so
stick with it).

We arrived at 12-30 and soon found the car which was being stored at a trout
fishery. The car looked a little sorry for itself being covered in tree sap
and I was just beginning to get that sinking feeling, as a brief phone call
with the owner filled in the tiny detail that he'd taken one of the heads off
and the bits were all in the trunk. Starky proved very knowledgeable and was
very helpful in appraising the cars strengths and weaknesses, and between us
we decided that on balance it was still well worth it, so we gently winched
the car on to the flatbed and paid the 'friend' who had been detailed to
collect payment.

By this time I was a little flummoxed about what I was going to do with a bag
of bits from a complicated and expensive to fix engine, and just how badly Mrs
Hancock would greet this news. Now Starky is not an Alfa specialist, his
'Classic Car' being a 1966 Austin Westminster 3.0, but he decided to give a
mate of his who works at a breakers yard a call on his mobile as we headed
towards the Dartford Tunnel heading back North, and what happened next went a
bit like this. "Charlie, I'm looking for an Alfa engine, a V6 3.0 with 24
Valves, any chance you could have a look and see what you've
got...........You're looking at one!..are you sure? It has to be
24Valves.....it says 24Valves on the injection, Is it OK ? yes as far as you
know..can you see the boss and let me know how much and call me back?"  Ten
minutes later the call came back... #150 ($250) as seen or #225 ($340) with a
28 day money back if its no good"  I grabbed the 225 deal with both hands, and
we were not even 20miles away from the pickup point. Suddenly things seemed a
lot more encouraging, though I confess I have yet to see the engine as I
write.

The car was unloaded onto the only available space..my front lawn...and with
the battery as dead as a dodo and the hood jammed I decided to give the car a
wash and get all the c**p off as a first job. A neighbour came over to have a
look, and his Irish mate then said "Oi had one those in Dublin and absolutely
loved it until I drove it into the sea on the beach and it was never reliable
after that"  In true horse dealing fashion he then proceeded to make me an
offer for the car, and when I politely declined he said "Well you'l be gettin
rid of the Twin Spark soon so I'l make you an offer for that", until my good
lady wife arrived and said "well I'm having the Twin Spark when this one's
fixed" , so the anticipated storm from that quarter hasn't happened...yet.

Once the battery held some charge I was delighted to find that everything
electric worked except the central locking, and the 'plip' for the alarm infra
red flashes, but has no effect. The clock LEDs are bad, and records show that
this was replaced under warranty at #1000! The leather upholstery is good and
will clean up nicely. The wheels are a bit of a mess having been kerbed and I
need to know if that brushed stainless type finish can be achieved by a
refurbisher, but thats a long way ahead yet. Got to get it running
first.........To be continued.

It was back down to London the next day in the Twin Spark for a long arranged
weekend and on sunday we all went to the Science Museum to see the Alfa Romeo
exhibition which has been extended a month to the end of May. It helps to be
an Alfa nut, but even the non car types were impressed with the shapes and
restoration work on the prewar cars, and my son wanted to take the T33 flat 12
home with him. As luck would have it there was a sectioned 24 Valve V6 on
display so I was able to take some good digital photos of the arrangement of
the timing belt and pulleys and the serpentine belt, as I am not really
familiar with this engine, so I need all the help I can get, and I have no
doubt you will have to tolerate a number of questions from me, not all of them
intelligent.

Well, if you have been, thanks for reading. On the other hand, If you've
fallen asleep then I've cured your insomnia.

Tim Hancock  164TS,164 Super            Boston UK
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