156, GTV or bust

["Peter Hoare" <kingfrick@domain.elided>]

My Fiancee and I are currently looking for a new car and ever since that 
first ride with me in my '72 spider doing hair-raising things on mountain 
passes, she has been hinting at an Alfa. With this in mind, I visited the 
local Alfa dealer and looked at both a GTV and a 156. She is leaning towards 
the 156 and I am partial to the look of the GTV.

However this is the meat of the issue here: The GTV was very obviously 
designed by a man with no legs and extra long arms. I know this has long 
been and alfa feature but this was ridiculous. I am only just 6 foot and 
there is no way on God's earth I could drive it. My feet were jammed hard 
againt the steering wheel and I could not reach to get the car into first 
with out my holding my head at an angle against the roof.

So, with that out of the question, I looked at the 156. Without the badge on 
the front it could have been any old Toyota. Inside, other than the silly 
Alfa air vents, it was very unremakable. No Manual version available.

Now the question: need I be more charitable? I have owned and driven Alfas 
all of my life. I learned to drive in an '83 gulietta 1.8 liter and often 
wondered why other cars would drift through corners at speeds that were not 
even fun in the Alfa. I currently own and drive a '72 spider as my daily car 
and would drop my fiancee in an instant if there was any hint that my true 
love should go (there is really only room for one love in a man's heart).

It appears that Alfa has drifted so far from what I love that nothing 
remains but the badge. The mechanicals of the Milano are interesting but 
only if I thought it might stay together longer then a few weeks without 
something expensive breaking.

Without a rear wheel drive, manual, with some real Siren singing beneath the 
hood, what's the point?

I have twice now pulled hard U-Turns in traffic and slid the spider sideways 
into a parallel parking bay on the other side of the road before the 
passenger or the other traffic knew what was happening. It appears that 
current Alfa could only do this with divine intervention (this is blasphemy 
I know; God drives a rearwheel drive I'm certain).

Ok I know this is long....... here is the point.

I am a man losing my religion, save me or excommunicate me.


Peter (My soul is burning) Hoare
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